Wednesday, August 8, 2012

“the friend zone”

What to do when you’re stuck in “the friend zone”

1. Understand that they are your friend and will not shoot you down in cold blood even if they want to do that. They will try to let you down easily, but you must…
2. Realize that your friend is NOT attracted to you. Despite of your personality or how well the two of you get along, they will never view you as a potential partner. So,
3. Reevaluate your friendship. Have you been cock blocking? Well, you should stop doing that! You may cause your friend, or even yourself, to miss out on their true love! You need to…
4. Get over it. Do not continue to pine for your friend. And,
5. MOVE ON! Get a new man or woman, and be happy when your friend dates too.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

The DO'S and DON'Ts of College: Freshman Edition

DO: Be 100% honest on the roommate survey your college gives you.
DON'T: Fill out the roommate survey randomly, at the last minute, or in hopes to having the "perfect" roommate.

DO: Get to college early, colleges usually have special events and plans for Freshman. It also gives you a chance to meet your roommate, get your books, and settle in.
DON'T: Party the first week, or month for that matter, of your Freshman year. You have a second semester and three years after that to party, your first semester GPA can make or break you.

DO: Date.
DON'T: Date someone who is a junior or senior.
DON'T: Have random slutty sex with frat guys, sorority girls, or the general masses.

DO: Stay true to yourself.
DON'T: Try to reinvent yourself because people don't know you. When they do finally get to know you, they will find out that you have been lying to them and yourself.

DO: Go to all your classes.
DO: Take advantage of your classes attendence policy.
DON'T: Skip classes to drink, smoke, have sex, party, or sleep in because you did all the aforementioned things the night before.

DO: Cram for your exam the night before because all your classes gave you papers and exams due the same day.
DON'T: Be bad at cramming for your exam.

Relationships and Such

Relationships can be hard, and apparently the only way to fix them is to talk to a gay person. As the gay person my friends flock to, I can tell you that it gets annoying after a while. Yet, I have learned a lot by listening to and fixing the relationship problems that my friends have. Advice:

* Be open to meet new people. Do not limit your choices to your friends. There are plenty of girls and guys that are your type that you do not already know.

* Do not be afraid to make the first move. Sometimes you just have to find your hidden courage.

* Talk about problems. Do not hide your insecurities or problems with your partner. The more they know about you, the more they can understand and help.

* Talk to your partner about problems that you are having in a calm manner. If you are not calm, they will not listen.

* Assert equality in the relationship from the start, even if one person is older. A relationship where both people are not equal will always lead to a break-up.

* Realize when a relationship is over, and let it end.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

College Friends: Is Living Together a Good Ideas

As a Junior in college, I took up the opportunity to live with my friends in a townhouse to get out of paying for a $3000 meal plan. This is where all the problems started. Because none of us were going to buy a full meal plan, we all decided that we would take turns buying food, but we never got around to making a chart listing out when people should buy food. This started arguements about whose turn it was to buy food, why some people were buying food more than other people, and why some were spending more money on food than others. This problem was one, of many mind you, that we let sit on the backburner till it got to a point that the house divided and tension was so thick that not even a stake knife could cut it. We also had the brillant idea to not create a cleaning chart. This led to more tension as only two of the six people living in the house cleaned it. As the food disappeared and the floor got messy, tensions just continued to rise, until we got to a point where we could not stand each other anymore. Even now, after making amends with each other, there is still signs of resentment and anger amoung us. Has it ruined our friendships... no. Yet, they are probably a little tainted due to it. So, my advice this week, if you are going to live with friends:

*Set the rules and regulations up before hand.
*Make sure to have a cleaning chart in place.
*Talk to your friends as soon as there is an issue, do not wait.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Family (The Good)

So, this is going to be the beginning of me baring my soul for the readers of my blog, so you better enjoy it while it lasts!

The Good: Adolescence is a time where most children strive to cut the strings away from their families and start making their own decisions and seeking autonomy. Yet, I never really was into autonomy. Indeed, while some people could not stand to be in the same room with their parent, I was driven to spending more time with them. So, when I realized I was gay in the sixth grade, one might think that I would have been able to tell them easily. Well, it was not easy. In fact, I did not tell them at all. Not in the sixth, seventh, or eighth, not in high school, and not in the first few years of my college. Why? Because even though my bond with my family was strong, there was still a part of me that feared their rejection. Their utter disdain at the thought of me falling in love with a man instead of a woman, their disappointment that I would not have children that are my own flesh and blood, and their objections to me ever being married to that man that I loved. Thus, to spite the whispers that went around town after my big school coming out in the eighth grade, my brother asking me, and my mother telling me that she was okay with gay people, I continued to deny who I was because it gave me comfort. Yet, I realized that I was never going to truely be open to finding a man to love until I embraced who I was fully, and that included telling my family that I was gay. After getting up all the courage I could muster, I called my mom to finally tell her. Well, she got the jump on me, asking me about my love life for the first time in my whole life. Although I still was a bit nervous, I told her about a guy that I had been seeing. My mom took the news wonderfully, only happy that I was happy. So, I did all that worrying for nothing. Advice: Maybe you are too?

Playing a New Game (for a while)

So, after writing five posts on roleplaying, in a time where I no longer actually roleplay, I have decided to give up on writing any more roleplaying system reviews or tips until I pick up another character sheet and play again. Instead, I am going to focus on matters that are more important in my life at the moment. This includes:

*Friendships (Is living together a good idea?)
*Relationships (General advice)
*College Life (The do's and don'ts)
*Education and Psychology (My lovely major)

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Problems Harry Potter Had

Now, there can be problems with the windows system. These problems come from player involvement. Some players may be pushed to the forefront of the role-play due to the circumstances created by the GM or by the player's personal desire to be the center character. Other players may be pushed to secondary characters or guest characters due to the inability of the player to get into their character. There a some ways to deal with these issues.

If a character is in the forefront too much:

* The GM can incapacitate the character or create a story where the character is secondary instead of the lead.

*The GM can allow for "off screen" scenes, which are scenes that players talk about outside of the roleplay which are still cannon.

If a character is a secondary character:

*Talk with player and better define the character's past, present, and future.

*The GM should make a plot that makes that character more important.

*The GM can also allow for the player to create their own storyline.

If the GM does not do this, players will become jealous of each other, and the role-play may fall apart. Thus, solving these problems as soon as they start is important.